Daily Reflections From My Window

January 11, 2021 Monday

“Don’t give so much of yourself to others that you begin to disappear from your own story.”

Stacie Bloomfield, from “Give Yourself Margin, A Guide to Rediscovering and Reconnecting with Your Creative Self”

I’m really enjoying this book^ mentioned above. Amy gave it to me the other day as a gift. She knows I’m struggling with what to do next and has always thought of me as a creative being, even when I didn’t, and thought this book would get me some clarity. I read a few pages a day and think about what it means and even though it’s only been a few days, I’ve made some big decisions.

I’ve decided to let go of publishing Macaroni Kid for my area at the end of this month. This was a big one. I’ve been publishing for almost 11 years. I learned so much, made so many wonderful friends, and really felt that it helped our community. I hope it continues. I have little say about who takes over. It was truly my passion project, but it’s time for me to get back to my roots of creating things and that part of me has been buried under learning how apps work, or website design…I need to feel things in a tactile way, so that’s part of why I made this decision. To get back to fiber. Maybe even sewing again. Did you know that I am a trained dressmaker and tailor and had my own custom clothing business way back when? I loved it and met every project as a puzzle. But I needed a change from that for a while and now I am woefully out of practice.

And then there’s the herd. I’ve got a lot of fiber to go through, get to where it needs to go to be made into incredible products. I can’t do it all myself, but have been fortunate to find fellow alpaca folks who share their resources freely and I now have a few leads for what I want to do.

Today is looking bright. It may not be as sunny as it has been, but it’s bright with the snow. It’s about 18*. Brrrr. Yes, we are still covered.

I have to head to Tractor Supply today for some alpaca food and other items. It’s good to have a goal for the day.

Remember to wash your hands, don’t touch your face, stay home but if you MUST go out, wear a mask and keep the length of a full grown llama (which is bigger than an alpaca) between you and the next person.

Have a blessed day!

Daily Reflections From My Window

December 28, 2020 Monday

“People in their handling of affairs often fail when they are about to succeed. If one remains as careful at the end as he was at the beginning, there will be no failure.”

Lao Tzu (AKA Laozi)

I fell in love with the teachings of LaoTzu when I read “The Tao of Pooh”. The Philosopher recommended it so I got one for me and one for him. If you are new to philosophy, as I was at the time, it’s a great start. It put philosophy in terms I could kind of grasp. I loved it. πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»πŸ‘πŸ»

I’m always pursuing new adventures and then hanging on too long. This time, I’ve been really feeling the pull towards my fiber and alpaca endeavors while juggling my Macaroni Kid responsibilities. Is it time to move on there with Mac Kid? My family says yes, my heart says no. I’ve put 11 years of hard work into building my local edition’s newsletter, website and local subscriber base. I don’t know if I am the right person for the job anymore, but I know who is! She’s the busiest person I know and she would be perfect. She’s the only one that I would just hand this over to without question. She pushes me to continue when I don’t want to. She sees the importance in the community. Something to think about going forward. Would I be quitting right before I really succeeded? She needs one more thing like a hole in the head.

As for fiber, it’s in my blood. And fabric. And sewing. And the gentle hum of the sewing machine, spinning wheel or snowblower. Snowblower? It’s what I like to do when I need to think-or not think. As my friend Tammy reminds me, I’ve been too much in my head lately. Overthinking everything. Yesterday, the sky was blue, the air was crisp and comfortable and it was a perfect day to clear snow and get some exercise. I asked Jay to start the snowblower for me (he’s much better at it) and off I went.

I figure that I walked about 3 miles-pushing the machine up and down the driveway first in one direction, then the other, until it was clear, thinking about nothing but the task at hand and even once running out of gas and having to walk up the steep hill (that you can’t see in the photos) to get more gas and back down with the canister to the machine. I was exhausted when I was finished!

Then Jay returned from his errands and said, “Let’s go for a walk.” Off we drove to a neighborhood where we could walk on the flat. The good thing was that football was still on (Yay Steeler’s!) and there was no one on the streets. It seemed like a long walk-almost an hour and since I had forgotten to turn my 99 Walks App on to record our distance, Jay obliged by retracing our route in the car. It always seems further, but it was only 2.68 miles. I walked a little more when we got home and am sure that I got my Sunday Six in.

As I wait for the sun to come up, I realize that I’ve got company this morning on my lamp. As I think. He got flushed.

Tammy, who knows me better than I know myself, despite living in another state for many years now, surprised me with a lovely Christmas gift. Can you believe that I have never had one? It’s a yarn bowl! It keeps a ball of yarn beautifully confined yet workable. I absolutely adore it and couldn’t wait to use it! She said that it was made by a local craftsman in her state. Even more special that it was made by human hands and not by machine. She laughed and said, “This is definitely NOT in my wheel house! But it IS in yours!” She’s right.

Maybe I need to go back to my original wheelhouse. Fabric, fiber, more tactile pursuits. Creating on a computer, though exciting to learn new things and ways to do things, is not the same as creating with ones hands. This WILL require some thought.

Remember to wash your hands, don’t touch your face, stay home but if you MUST go out, wear a mask and keep the length of a full grown llama (which is bigger than an alpaca) between you and the next person.

Have a blessed day!